I did it...I made a plan to work out, and I did. I did the 30 Day Shred level 1. I've never progressed past level 2, but I'm hoping to make it there someday. I didn't do so well in the eating. When I got home I had a small bowl of chips and half a cup of chocolate milk. Why I decided to do this right before I was set to work out, I am not entirely sure. I saw them on my pantry and just gave in. The fact that I still worked out is a major plus for me.
As for the rest of the day, it was decent. Had my regularly planned meals, except at breakfast where I had one of the yogurts from Tim's, and a double double instead of my regular WW bagel and light cream cheese. Lunch was turkey on dark rye with lettuce, tomato, and mustard, with minestrone soup, and dinner is spinach and ricotta stuffed chicken breast with baked potato and veggies. I am seriously behind with my water, so I'll have to step that up.
Last night was a major one for me. I had already made the commitment to come back to this, but last night as I was getting ready for bed, my bf caught a glimpse of me changing......the look on his face said it all. We ended up getting into a huge fight because I had gained so much weight in the last couple months and he didn't realise. I know ppl will say he's a major a-hole because of making comments about my weight, but I don't see it as being superficial or mean. Honesty is honesty...if he's not attracted to me looking a certain way, he is entitled to feel that way. Just the same as I would be entitled to not be attracted to him if something changed in his appearance. But we ended up fighting because I got hurt (heart and brain are two very different things!) and my frustrations just connected with his frustration, and we ended up having it out. But it made me open my eyes. I am disappointed in myself...but to see that mirrored in him was heartbreaking.
I don't know if this is good or not, but I want to do this as much for him as for me. I deserve to look and feel my best, but doesn't he deserve to have a gf that looks her best? I'm sure some feminists out there would smack me...but though we try to ignore it and argue otherwise, humanity is very superficial. How many studies have been done on first impressions and the fact that better looking people get better jobs, promotions, etc.? I know he likes me for me personality wise, but I don't see an issue with also wanting to improve my outer shell as well.
My plan of attack for Wednesday is:
1) Water
2) Eat my planned meals and track it in my calorie counting app (cause I no longer have access to the WW tracker)
3) Either hit the gym, or do the Shred again
4) Ignore the chips on the pantry...I will save them for my movie night on Saturday, where I will track it, and accept it.
In other news...I get to move in 8 days!! We bought a condo and take possession next Thursday! Very excited :)
Argh, I had a nice comment and I hit a new page by mistake so I lost it!! **sigh**
ReplyDeleteDon't deprive yourself of chips. I have a treat everyday. I track it and move on. :) I love my ice cream...lol
We all say we lost/losing weight for ourselves and that's true to an extent. But we've lost weight for other people too. I lost weight because I didn't want to be the fat friend anymore. I wanted guys to be attracted to me. I didn't want rude people making comments about my weight. Sure I wanted to be healthier, but in reality, be healthy wasn't the only reason. It wasn't just for me. It may be superficial, but we're human. We want acceptance from others. Like you said, the brain and the heart are two different things. But it does hurt. I don't think your bf meant it in a hurtful way. He was honest and I think because of that he will support you throughout your weight loss journey. He wants you to be healthy and happy. Sometimes we need a kick in the ass like that. It hurts, but it helps in the long run. I have had many of those kick me moments...lol
If he supports you...that's what important! And congrats on the condo! I'm moving to Toronto in the fall for school. UofT my masters in theatre :)
I have been doing the Shred on and off for almost a year, and I too, have never been able to complete level 3! It is IN-TEN-SE.
ReplyDeleteThanks ladies! Good luck on your Masters K, I did mine in English lit, also at U of T.
ReplyDeleteAmie - I think I tried level 3 like once, and died half way thru (ok, maybe like 1/16 thru). I'm ok with level 1 and 2 right now! Have you tried her 30 Day Ripped? I'm too scared right now!